Saturday, February 17, 2007
i guess it just another new yearevery year its the same thingnew year eve = steamboat and cousinsnew year= lots and lots of unknown relatives coming say hi and pretend to know u very well by saying "aiyo you getting more and more skinny"when the fact is dat every year i'm gaining weighttrue dat i enjoy the yummy food and of cos the ang baosbut entertaining the relatives is one thing i dread to dofelt so superficialthis year aint gg to change muchnow dat i went to poly and getting older i know it is matter of time when they are gg to ask"aiyo dun have bf meh?"sigh. still cant believe that a few years back i can be so excited abt new year dat i cant fall asleepmabe becos being a child new year is when we will get to drink lots of soft drinks and eat chocolate and play with peeps ardnow when we grew older new year is merely abt money and da foodmaybe there is an new obession fer methat is to drink. drank 5 cups of red wine just now thinking of the past year. found 6 bottle of bacardi breezer. if tml dun nid to go relatives hse i surely drink finish . use of using alcohol to numb myself is a gd thing i rarely find alcohol stuffs ard in my hse. otherwise i might be dead from alcohol posioningmom and dad told me to sleep early fer ard 5 times but decided not to they been fighting since just nowglad dat i'm the thing to make them shout at me instead of each othertired of lifetired of livingmaybe my grandma will come and take me away with her soon.and i can leave this worldi miss her.its been 9 yrs since she was gonei miss those days when she'll protect me from mum's beating and say that if dun want to study its oknow i cant even find someone fer me to lean oneverynight lay awake thinking what will happen to me in futurewoke up in tears when i dreamt of something bad or even something too nice that it'll not happen. now dat holidays is here maybe i could take a break. i'm not feeling gdsave me will u?
